A few days ago, Kim and I were having that first cup of coffee enjoying some typical bantering that 4:30am brings. We’re a little strange like that.

I don’t remember exactly what we were talking about but I said, “Hey Siri, tell Kim to go back to China.” It’s an inside joke I won’t bore you with. We understand it.

Anyway, Siri asked me to confirm and I did without really listening to what she said. My bad. She sent a message to a guy named Ken I know whose last name sounds a little like “back to.” It read, “Vagina.”

The rest is history. Thanks Siri!

Every American who voted in the recent election is a patriot. Whether by mail or in person and regardless of their choices, Americans participated in the process in numbers larger than I can remember. With so many people participating, the winner is the winner in my book. The “American People” have spoken.

In his first term, our so-called President has demonstrated poor leadership skills… in horrifying detail. He insists he’s the winner based on that narrative he concocted months before the election. He knew he was going to lose! The story goes something like this – everyone who votes against him is an evil Democrat out to get him. They all came up with mail-in voting scheme as a way to “steal the election.” Okay. Fine. Whatever. But there’s no evidence of fraud and you don’t get to suppress their votes.

Move aside Bozo, there’s a real leader in the wings. Concede, wish him well and cooperate with an orderly transition. That way, you won’t go down in history as the biggest Dick to ever inhabit the White House. For once in your life, do the right thing. Thank you.